Dog Agility Trials

I’m ready. I’m ready. Just give me the signal. Go. Bang. Start. I know what to do. I’m the best. The best. Here. Now. At this championships. It’s what I trained for. What I live for. Third last time. First now. I’m the best. The best. It’s my time to shine.

I know. I know. Just give me the signal. I’m ready. The A frame then the collapsed tunnel. The tyre jumps then the dog walk. The ramps then the teeter-totter. The weave poles then the pause table then the winged jump. It’s no problem. I’ve done it a million times.

Come on. Come on. What’s the hold up? I’m the best. The best. No one’s as good as me.

Now. Go. Yes. Let’s go. I’m in my element. Perfect that. Straight over the A frame. Now to my left. The collapsed tunnel. And yes. I love this. That satiny feel on my back. Where now? Of course. The tyre jumps. There’s my run and – leap!

Yes. Perfect. One, quick step, two, again, three. Now to the right. The dog walk. Careful. Don’t hurry. Don’t slip like that time. But don’t be too cautious either.

Now, the ramps. Up and down. Up and down. It’s barely an obstacle that. Why do they even bother?

Good. Now loop back. Good. Keep breathing. Even breaths. And on to the teeter-totter. Careful. Stay focused. Wait for the tip, slowly now. Let it down. And – yes. Rush off the end. Like a pro. I can’t go wrong. This is perfect. I’m the best obstacle course dog ever. Look at me go. Look how agile I am.

The weave poles? What are they? Nothing. In and out and left and – god. No. Not now. I can’t. Must push on. But it’s there. It’s coming. All that practice. But – no. I can be quick. Execute it perfectly then go the pause table. I’m ahead of time. I’m still the best. I am. No one else could do this and continue. Poop and go on.

Yes. The weave poles. They’re mine. I’m the best. Don’t put your hand on your head. What’s the matter? This is nothing. Part of the course. A further demonstration of my agility.

No. I can’t be disqualified. What are you talking about? I’m the best. The best. The best.


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